Big Mouth

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So, I was talking to a writer today and they said something many writers have thought before:

I wish I could just query agents, even if the book isn’t finished/polished yet, just to see if they like my idea and if they’ll request it.

As and agent and as a writer who has done the reassurance/ego-stroking/tell-me-I’m-not-crazy-with-this-book-idea query, I say unto this writer and all others pondering this same path: Don’t. Do. It.

Sure, it would be so very nice to know that an agent likes your idea and whatever sample pages enough to request more of your manuscript. But here’s the problem: they’re gonna request more of your manuscript… and you’re gonna have to send it!

Nobody wants to hear about the really awesome Christmas present they’re getting… in July. I assume that you’re querying me because you have a book you want me to sell. My job isn’t to stroke your ego, at least not until you’re my client and we’re working together. I can’t be expected to give feedback to everyone who sends along an idea. Don’t clog up my inboxe with queries for things that aren’t done, just because you want reassurance that you’re on the right track.

Yes, it’s a totally human and understandable impulse. But don’t act on it. If you need reassurance, get a critique group. If you need reassurance from someone in the industry who’ll be a good judge of whether your project is saleable or not, go to a writers conference and pay for a critique. At a conference, at least, you’ve paid for my time and I’ll happily oblige. Maybe find a freelance editor. See if any agents or editors or industry types are auctioning off critiques or giving them away on their blogs. (Hint, October’s query contest, hint, hint, hint…)

Most of these options, as you might guess, cost money, but such is life. If you don’t have an agent or a finished manuscript yet, you can’t expect someone in the industry to make you feel better for free. There are not enough hours in the day and, besides, I can’t really tell how good your project is until I see it finished. An idea and a snappy first 15 pages are one thing… the execution of that idea and the rest of the pages are what will either make you or break you.

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I interrupt my regularly scheduled programming to present you with a disclaimer. You know, the kind you see certain networks and radio stations airing during controversial or polarizing segments:

“The views expressed here are my own and in no way represent the views or policies of any literary agency or publishing house.”

For those of you who know about me, you might know that I currently read for a fabulous literary agency. I’m also involved in the editorial department of a publishing house. I have a fair share of agent and editor friends, colleagues and acquaintances.

Not that I’ll be saying much in the way of controversy, but I just want to make it clear that opinions expressed on this blog are my own. I cherish the relationships I’ve made in publishing. In no way do I want to jeopardize them.

So if I write a post about querying, agents, editors, publishing, writing, any of it, that opinion is mine and mine alone. And if an idea came from something directly said to me or something I’ve encountered, I’ll do my best to make that clear. Otherwise, the content presented here does not represent the views of any company I’m affiliated with.

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Here’s a quick consideration that may not matter to anyone else but that always manages to crack me up a little bit. When you send your manuscript to an agent, be super aware of what the file name is. That seems like common sense but you’d be surprised.

When I scroll down to the bottom of a query e-mail, I expect to see something mundane like, oh:

LastName_Title.doc

Title.doc

Name_First_50_pages.doc

Something nice and neutral. What I don’t really want to see is:

Title_Revision_37.doc

Title_TOTAL_OVERHAUL.doc

Or, worse yet:

LastName_First_Draft.doc

Keep it really simple, really professional. If you track your revisions with the document title, make sure to take the ten extra seconds and “Save As” a copy of your document with a nice, generic title.

In acting class, my teachers always said: “The audition doesn’t start when you begin your monologue. From the second you enter the building to the moment you leave, you’re auditioning.”

So watch the message you send with your document titles. The ones about “first draft” or “revision 37″ or “overhaul” can sometimes make me either dread what I’m going to find when I open the document or make me wonder what’s wrong with it. All those numbers and markers are part of your process… keep them behind the scenes.

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A staff and strategy meeting at Kidlit.com HQ (witness blog stats toolbar on screen… it has improved since then). Sushi (looking hungry, left) and Smokey (in lazy beam of sunlight) discuss trending and goals for the next fiscal year. Overheard at the meeting:

Sushi: This big white beeping thing is so nice and warm to lie on.
Smokey: Let us nap on it.
Sushi: Not until The Annoying But Useful Food Dispenser gets the black clicky thing out of our faces.
Smokey: Agreed.
Sushi: Or feeds us.
Smokey: Have you no shame?
Sushi: Obviously not.
Smokey: Let us nap atop the manuscript she’s trying to finish next.
Sushi: Agreed.

Hey everyone. Kidlit.com got it’s official first visitor (who wasn’t me on another computer and who didn’t date me, know me since the second grade or give birth to me) on April 7th, 2009. Now, on the 17th, we’ve shot past the 600 mark. In ten short days, you guys have made Kidlit.com such a fun place to be. Here’s to the next ten, the next hundred and the next thousand days after that!

People who read children’s literature (and any related blogs, duh) are the best ever (double duh). It’s scientifically proven. I’ve got the study right here, from Shmarvard Shmuniversity. Give yourselves a big round of applause, tell your friends and don’t forget to link to this blog in your sidebar. There’s lots of good stuff to come (including a super duper exciting interview that I can’t blab about just yet).

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I cringe when I think back on a conversation I had a few summers ago with an executive editor from a very large publishing house. I was at this conference as a writer, before I entered the industry from the business end, and blathering about a manuscript I was working on, a YA about a girl whose sister died.

As one of the only children’s writers at the conference, I definitely had a lot of this editor’s time. On this particular occasion, I used my limelight to open my big mouth and blab something along the lines of the following:

There are so many books out there like THE CLIQUE, ya know? All fluff and no substance! What I really wanna do is, like, write a book that’s deeper than that. One about real emotions and stuff. There’s nothing like that out these days.

Ha! Haha! Hahahahahahaha! Excuse me while I choke on my coffee. Boy howdy was I ever young and ignorant.

I think the word I was groping for is: “literary.” And, if you’ve been in a bookstore lately, you know that it’s impossible to turn around without bumping into a highly literary, emotionally charged YA book or two thousand. Death, drugs, divorce, heartbreak, YA has it all.

Now that I’ve been on the other side of the table and reading slush, I’ve seen ignorant statements like mine repeated by many authors. “There are like, totally no books about (insert totally common and well-represented theme or topic here).”

That’s called not reading enough. There are so many books out there that it’s impossible to read even a thousandth of one percent of your way through the shelves at a bookstore. More of them come out every day. While the average adult has abysmal reading habits, a writer has no excuse.

The work published by others is our only textbook when we’re honing our craft. Ideally, writers in any genre should read as much as they can, inside their genre and outside. In kidlit, writers shouldn’t just stick to fantasy or historical or literary, or even their age group, for that matter, but experience all the wonderful offerings on the shelves.

There are those writers who think their work will be corrupted by reading while they write. That makes little sense to me. More often than not, it’s these kinds of writers who convince themselves that there’s never been a YA book about a main character grieving over her dead sister. I guess I can understand this attitude if you’re reaching for something experimental with your manuscript, but not if you have commercial aspirations, like a lot of writers do. I can say for certain that my writing has improved immeasurably since I started reading more.

Instead of feeling intimidated and viewing already published work in your genre as “competition,” view it as a learning exercise. Read, make note of what other authors are doing. If you spot things than could’ve worked better in a story, boy howdy, you’ve got material for your own manuscript! It will make you look even savvier if you can query an agent or editor and mention some “comp titles,” or works in the same vein as yours. Because all editors and agents know that a book like yours exists out there, somewhere. No idea or book is absolutely, completely unique. And that’s a good thing! Even better, if previous books like yours have has sold well, that’s great news for you and your project.

So read a lot, read widely and read well. You’ll pick up new ideas, realize things about your own writing and feel like you belong in a community. And unless your novel concept is way, way, way, way out there, like zombies in the world of PRIDE AND PREJUDICE*, for example, keep your mouth shut in front of executive editors until you know what the real market for work like yours looks like.

* Just kidding! Someone already did that. Introducing PRIDE AND PREJUDICE AND ZOMBIES.

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